Lovers Can Mend It. With Sweet Loving Words.

9:34 pm. 34 is my favourite number. It seems to stalk me a little. Anyways, it did not end with Dillan even though that day he did infact forget to talk to me. I talked to him about talking to me and he said he's been going through a lot of shit in his life and it's been hard. So I just let him be. But then the next day I said hi and he didn't say anything so I guess I just felt hurt and said "Okay, you don't want to talk to me, I get it." and he just exploded at me. Saying things like "OMFG DID I SAY THAT? NO" "IM BUSY" okay. So it's basically what I guessed after all. He didn't want to talk to me. It went on for three days. He was acting totally normal, when I came in vent to talk to Zach and people like that he said hi to me like there was nothing wrong. I wasn't about to be so easy. I didn't reply. For three days he went on trying to act normal only to have me shoulder him off. On the third day though, I came on at around 2 am and started playing Gunbound with Chris. He randomly joined us. He said hi to me directly infront of the whole room. I didn't want to be all awkward so I said hello. As he played he made his apologies. After we were done we had a lengthy talk and I decided to forgive him. He was being so sweet and desperate. Then about a week later I say something to him and he was all like "I don't know I'm BOTTING" For the past week he hadn't been that actively talking to me either. So I was rather ticked. I said "fine I won't bother talking to you then" I haven't actually been able to talk to him in person since then but we've been leaving messages for each other. He's been leaving really sweet messages and I can just feel how sorry he is. In my response I basically forgave him but his response wasn't great. All he said was "I read it, every word of it." and then some little bit that had to do with something I said at the end. But it really showed nothing about what he thought about my response. I mean...I really said somethings in there that meant a lot to me. I was kind of hoping that I'd get a response from him saying he loved me and that he understands and that he wants to be with me...But it was empty. Maybe he was saving the conversation for later because he was hoping that he'd get to talk to me later? But he didn't even leave another message when he left. He usually says I love you, good night when he leaves even if I'm not there....Sigh. I don't know. Why do we always have these fights anyways? We love each other to death but we're just not compatible. We don't get along, and we don't think in the same way. All we have in common basically is that we love each other..